Sterling Allan's personal crisis as a microcosm of society's precarious perch. "Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these, my brethren."
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Sterling Allan's personal crisis as a microcosm of society's precarious perch. "Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these, my brethren."
Sept. 9, 2003
My life is at a crucial breaking point -- either of collapse, on the one extreme, or of coming into a new era of well being and prosperity, on the other hand.
It seems the world is at such a pivot point as well.
I can't help but think that what happens to me in the next few hours and days will be a parallel to what becomes of the world in the next few hours and days.
Will I pull through without going to destruction? Will we?
If I do, it will be because of the goodness and generosity that is in the hearts of mankind, not of myself.
If the world makes it through this crisis juncture, we will have deferred yet once again by the grace of God the calamities that await our society because of the awful situation in which we find ourselves.
I found out this evening that despite the hard work I'm putting in on my temporary, full-time, in-a-pinch day job framing a home, as well as the work I do from home that brings in a trickle of income here and there, I have once again maxed out on my credit, exceeding my borrowing capacity. Without assistance, I will need to begin shutting down the many information websites I administer in order to cut costs. I've never been this hard up -- working so hard and still being financially in desperate straights.
At the same time, I am awaiting word from an inventor of an alternative energy device (see related), that he is getting ready to come and demonstrate. It is a technology that would revolutionize the world, solving many of its energy needs. Obviously I would benefit personally when that comes to fruition; but my motivation in the project has been to help bring this technology to the world now, to provide a cushion for the fall of civilization that is pending to the degree that mankind does not alter its disastrous course.
I believe that we as a civilization can rally and change sufficiently to turn away the destructions that await us; but that it will take a major awakening and change of heart of the people -- something that many great souls around the world from all walks of life are seeking to bring about, thus increasing the probability that such a collective change could actually happen, without having to first go through massive calamities to actualize such a change of heart.
I read last evening that a chilling warning has been issued by Osama bin Laden's Al-Qaida network Sunday Sept. 7, 2003 that "threatened an onslaught against Americans so devastating it would obliterate memories of the September 11 suicide attacks." (ref) On Sunday, I read that my friend Glenn Kimball is going to be speaking on Coast to Coast radio on the pivotal anniversary this coming September 11, and one of the points of his presentation will be a discussion of prophetic warnings in "The Visions and Prayers of George Washington." According to Glenn's teaser account, when George Washington emerged from his tent after having his now famous vision, he said to his associate that "the eleventh of September was to be a most dreadful and fearful day."
Also on Sunday, I finished reading Sarah Menet's book "There Is No Death" and posted a book report my father composed regarding it. The brief book includes a prophecy she was given in her near death experience in which she was shown the September 11 attack in New York City, and was shown that shortly after this would come financial difficulties, followed by cataclysmic natural and man-made calamities.
Another major threat I've been reading about in the past few days, especially from Mitch Batros' Earth Changes TV newsletter, is regarding the mega volcano in Yellowstone that is beginning to make ominous rumblings. If it blew, it alone would throw the world into the dark ages, literally and a metaphorically.
Of course our hope as humans in denial is that none of these things will happen any time soon, if at all, and that our nominally comfortable lives will be able to continue as they are -- debt ridden and overdrawn though they are (speaking of the pampered Westerners who have their hands firmly planted in the sand of oblivion to our awful situation as a civilization, and the contributing role Westerners are playing in working toward our collective demise).
As I lay sleeping this evening, I was plagued with desperate dreams regarding my personal financial straights. The same theme kept occurring: a tiny portion of money would come here and there, but only through selling out to immoral principles. I finally woke up at 1:55 am and determined to at least put out an SOS message to my associates before hitting the wall. So I'm writing this when I should be getting rest before a big day tomorrow in which I will be helping to raise some large beams in a roofing structure in the entrance to this home I'm helping to build.
In hope for some hope, I opened my scriptures randomly to see what might turn up there. The verses I read seemed to mock me by the contradictions they posed to my predicament. That didn't bring me relief, but only heightened my frustration and angst, for I am where I am at now after two decades of doing my level best to serve God and mankind by following day by day what I believe God is directing me to do in accordance with conscience, and growing increasingly weary as my continued attempts to help mankind seem to be met by continued apathy and cold resistance. I do so much, but the compensation for my efforts go almost completely unrewarded -- especially financially -- but even emotional rewards of gratitude seem to grow increasingly aloof to the point that I wonder if my efforts are all in vain to be so unappreciated.
Again, in hopes to find something to stir hope and motivation in my heart weighed down by such thoughts, compounded by the reality of my financial situation, I decided I would look up the word "energy" in the LDS Topical Guide. It didn't take me long to realize I had hit on something very big in looking that up, using the Alphabetics methods I've discovered over the past several years. First of all, that word is not included as a topic, and that alone is of huge significance, for I have found that "omissions" like this are a way of shining a spotlight on what is obviously left out. Also, the vicinity words where the word "energy" would occur alphabetically, and the page number (122) and the associated words and numbers in the Old and New Testament dictionaries, are extremely poignant in a prophetic sense. They paint the picture of society on the brink -- disaster / wormwood on the one hand, the city of Enoch (Zion) on the other -- with endurance, deferring of calamity, and love as being the ingredients that make the difference as to how we get from here to there.
As I pondered on what I found, I increasingly realized that my personal crisis could very well be analogous to the crisis we face as a people right now. That notion is sustained to a certain extent by the desperation I sense in the tremendous volume of junk mail that comes through my inbox -- people hoping to make it lucky to relieve them from their present state. Because of the numerous email addresses I have as webmaster of many websites, I'm now receiving nearly 1500 spam messages a day.
Call me presumptuous, but the impression I had while reviewing these things was that the extent to which my friends and associates come to my aid at this time of desperation will be proportional to the degree to which the destructions that await us as a society will be turned away. If my friends and associates turn a near deaf ear to my SOS (which has been the case at times in the past when I've come to points of crisis not quite as severe as the one I'm in now), and I am left clamoring to the point that I have to begin pulling down my websites in order to cut costs sufficient to make ends meet for my little family; then the pending calamities that await us as a civilization will begin to be unleashed in their full fury.
However, if my friends and associates help me out (and my needs are more than just financial at this point as my emotional status has taken a beating with all this as well), then the extent to which they do so will likewise be the extent to which the calamities that face us as a people will be deferred, giving us more time as a civilization to chart a new course of introspection, renewing of commitment to goodness, and reconciliation with one another -- without having to go through massive conflict to get to that point.
Which way will we go? Which way will I go? Which way will you go?
You might say I've brought this upon myself, and it is my problem alone, and I alone should dig myself out. Let me say in reply, that I am beyond the point of being able to resolve this of myself. Without intervention, there will be serious repercussions. I will have to pull down my informational websites (their combined expenses run in the vicinity of $500 per month), and emotionally that will be like driving a sword through my spirit, for that is my gift, and its rejection for lack of reciprocation will be devastating to me, and the message that rejection sends to the universe will reverberate far beyond just me.
If you are among the few who have helped me out when I've been in a pinch in the past, then let me thank you from the bottom of my heart and say that I do hope to be able to make it up to you some day, either directly or indirectly through what I am instrumental in bringing forth as one of the members of the body of Christ, which functions as a whole, of which we are all a part.
A couple of weeks ago I was looking at some numbers related to my inventor friend who has the energy device I mentioned above that could revolutionize the world and provide us with the cushion to be able to avoid the calamities that are due otherwise. His numbers tie in very strongly with the idea of a evoking a society-wide repentance clause. If we bring it forth, it will be because society is ready for it, and merits its blessing at this time. If we don't bring it forth now, it will be because society has chosen to go the way of destruction instead, out of which will arise a much smaller remnant. The first two words that come in association with his main phone number, for example, are "heart" (New Testament dictionary) and "change" (Old Testament dictionary). There are also words that tie into the idea of the energy device and the technicalities of bringing it forth.
Below I've copied the contents of my personal website home page, www.sterlingdallan.com, which lists the various websites and other projects in which I am involved. Most of these are now placed in jeopardy with my present predicament.
I realize that many of you are in a plight not dissimilar from my own. Still, I am confident that 99% of you who receive this message are at least able to contribute $10.00. If you all did just that, I would not have financial problems for a long time, if ever again.
Each of the service websites I operate has a "donations" link. So far, those have gone almost completely unused (e.g. 1 in 1,000,000 visitors). If you have benefited from one or several of these websites, now would be a good time to show some appreciation financially. A small contribution by many could make all the difference, not just for me, but for the entire world.
For your convenience, here is a link that will forward you to PayPal:
http://tinyurl.com/mpoc
Thanks for all the good that you do, whether or not you appreciate what I do.
Sincerely,
Sterling D. Allan
* * * * * *
Sept. 8 $75.00
Sept. 9 $10.00
Sept. 9 $25.00
Sept. 10 $12.00
Sept. 10 $15.00
Sept. 10 $25.00
Sept. 10 $10.00
Sept. 11 $10.00
Sept. 11 $20.00
Sept. 13 $30.00
Sept. 13 $25.00
Sept. 15 $50.00
Sept. 15 $20.00
Sept. 16 $50.00
Sept. 17 $20.00
Sept. 18 $100.00
Sept. 19 $25.00
Sept. 29 $20.00
------------------
TOTAL $512.00
(note: Sept. 29 donation put us over the $500 mark mentioned in the message above;
donated by someone whose husband just lost his job.)
Page composed beginning ~2:00 am Sept. 9, 2003
Last updated September 30, 2003
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Last updated September 30, 2003
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